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Wednesday, March 17, 2010

American Idol Recap! Top 12 Finalists

Here's the deal...

This is gonna be more like a recap of a recap because at this point we all know that the little red-head that could, could NOT and got the boot so why do I even bother?

No matter.

Let's DO this thing!!!

This week the contestants slaughter sing the Rolling Stones.

Michael Lynche - "Miss You"

I like. Is good. Judges agree.

Uncomfortable sexual innuendo is exchanged between Ryan and Simon.

Didi Benami - "Play With Fire"

Imma be honest. I didn't actually see her perform. She couldn't have been that bad bc she wasn't in the bottom three.

The reason she remains a strong contender may be due to her own display of what I like to call "the Casey James factor"

(see below)

Casey James - "It's All Over Now"

Song title is a bad omen. His ability to stay on the show seems to ride almost solely on his looks because everything else about him is riding on my nerves.

Me no likes this.

Lacey Brown - "Ruby Tuesday"

Again, ominous song title/lyrics = ends badly.

Goodbye Ruby Tuesday?

Exactly.

Now we know what happens when a Minnie Mouse voiced cartoon character tries their hand at Idol.

Faux ginger FAIL.

Andrew Garcia - "Gimme Shelter"

I still like him but what I saw of his performance was scary. And embarrassing. Me thinks he could be in trouble...

Katie Stevens - "Wild Horses"

I am very much not a fan of this. Judges love. Whoop dee do.

Tim Urban - "Under My Thumb"

Ew.

Just, ew.

During judging Kara says she "agrees with the guys" after Randy and Ellen say they don't like it.

Fact of the day: Lesbians are not, in fact, "guys"

Kara might wanna watch her mouth before Ellen calls her out for wearing the hair of a silverback gorilla on her chest.

mmmmmkay?

Siobhan Magnus - "Paint It Black"

Gives the standard Adam Lambert caterwaul to end an otherwise dreary/operatic rendition of the song. As with Lambert, I like her, but sort of can't stand her singing.

That being said, she will likely come in 2nd yet have a better career than the winner.

Lee DeWyze - "Beast of Burden"

Ryan completely jinxes his performance by telling the entire world that Lee was "really nervous" about performing tonight.

Idiot.

He wasn't great but he wasn't terrible either. So, eh. I feel like this guy does the same thing every week which leaves me rather bored. Simon reads my mind because he basically says the same thing I just did only in a deeper and more British-y voice.

Paige Miles - "Honky Tonk Woman"

I think the performance is abhorrent until I find out she's suffering from laryngitis and then I just feel bad for her.

She dresses super cute.

Aaron Kelly - "Angie"

I think this kid is adorbs. He is looking less like K.D. Lang and more like Christian Bale every week.

albeit a very pretty lady version of Christian Bale and no, I did not doctor this picture in any way...

I suspect Idol execs are consulting my blog in order to better package the contestants because last week I made fun of Katelyn Epperly's poodle hair and Lilly Scott's heinous knit earrings and they both went home.

So, yeah. I matter!!!

Crystal Bowersox - "You Can't Always Get What You Want"

For the final time tonight it is proven that the titles of songs chosen this week appear to be quite foretelling. I didn't really get what I wanted from this performance because no matter how much I like this girl I did NOT like this.

The night closes with Simon flashing his signature creep wink to Crystal and the camera.

*End Scene*

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